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shadowglove88
Poker With The Boys 1/1 
4th-Jun-2010 11:18 pm
evil!possessed!Chloe


Title: Poker With The Boys
Sequel to: Choice
Series: Choice Series
Characters: Manny, Azazel, Beelzebub, Armaros, implied Chloe/Sam
Rating: T
Disclaimer: Don't own
Summary: Poker night with Manny, Azazel, and the boys in the Amityville home means beer, gossiping, bitching, figuring out who can cheat better, discussing Chloe's fertility, Sam's rise in demonhood...oh, yeah...and Ryan Reynolds' abs.
Written for my Paranormal25 150 Prompt Table. #19: Famous Haunted Location
A/N: Dedicated to latetothpartyhp, whose comment inspired me to write this!
Warning: I have no knowledge of poker...which probably shows. lol




"Your daughter is a killjoy."

Manny looked up from his cards and raised an eyebrow at Beelzebub. "How so?"

They were all congregated at the large table he'd had brought into one of the upper rooms of his new home, and all the usuals were at the table, with the contract to the souls they were willing to use as bets. When you were a demon, you didn't bet money, that was ridiculous. No, real demons bet souls-the souls they really didn't care for much, or need, or want.

"Well, you know how she doesn't let me inside the home with my flies buzzing all around." The demon still sulked at this, and to be truthful, he looked kinda weird and skinny when not surrounded by the huge mass of buzzing creatures. "And will she let me let them loose as a plague upon the neighborhood while I enjoy poker night with the boys? No. I try tell her: think of the realty value. If a plague occurs prices will drop, people will move...and I can get the neighbor's house at a discounted price! But will she listen to me? Will she have a heart? No." He huffed, looking at his cards. "That's one heartless demon."

"You're such a cheapskate, Beel." Armaros snickered, looking up from his cards. "You can afford a million of these houses if you wanted. Why do you want one at a discount price?"

"That smug satisfaction one feels when you get something after haggling?" Beelzebub replied as if this should be obvious. "Plus, I really like the house next to this one." He held his cards to his chest. "We should all buy a house on this road."

"There goes the neighborhood." A new voice snarked, and they turned in unison to see Chloe arrived with a tray of beer balanced on her hand. "Hey boys. Hows the cheating going?"

"Great."

"Fine."

"It's working."

Azazel just nodded.

Smiling, the blonde sent Manny an amused smile before passing out the cans of cooled beer to the demons, resting the tray against her tray. "If you all want more, they are cooling in the fridge. I'm not your serving wench, this was a one time deal." She then turned to her father. "I'm going upstairs to start that thing for Lilith."

He nodded. "Luck, duck."

She smirked. "Will need it."

And with that she left the room.

The men were silent until they heard her footsteps fade away, before turning to Manny.

"How's she doing?" Beelzebub wanted to know. "She's looking less depressed these days. Has she finally gotten over Azazel's spawn? Because my Penemue is-."

"Not half the demon my Gressil is." Armaros butted into the conversation.

Azazel snorted. "My son has embraced his demonhood. He is the demon hers has chosen, even before he accepted it." He smirked, looking at the two demons who'd been trying to line their spawn with his future daughter in law. "Once he is ready, it will be made official."

"If you're that sure, then why don't you want the girl knowing that Sam's accepted his demonhood?" Beelzebub wanted to know, sneering.

"Because, she'd go to see him if she did." Azazel replied in that superior way of his. "And what's driving him right now is Sam's desire to become demon enough for Chloe to consider him once more. If he realized the truth about why she left, he wouldn't be working as hard as he is right now."

"You're truly evil, Az." Manny shook his head.

"Thank you." Azazel grinned as they continued to play and talk.

"What do you have the brat doing again?" Beelzebub asked, curious.

"Crossroads." Azazel replied easily. "I wondered what sort of job would be best for him in his transition period. And those puppy eyes, they're perfect for a Crossroads. Plus. He's built. What mortal woman wouldn't want to kiss and seal the deal?"

Armaros had to nod his agreement to that.

Beelzebub snorted. "He isn't all that good looking. Sure, he's ripped, but he's a friggin mountain. That's abnormal."

"You just say that because Penemue is small in every aspect." Manny snorted in amusement. "One of my girls told me all about it."

The demons all around the table hollered in laughter.

Beelzebub narrowed his eyes at Manny. "I'll have you know it's not the size that matters, but how you use it!"

"Yes, my girl told me all about his problems in that area as well." Manny snickered.

Beelzebub threw down his cards. "Which of those succubi dared impugn my son's sexual abilities? That's the real reason you don't want to consider him for your daughter, isn't it? Because you think this one's son's is freakishly big somehow he'll be more potent and impregnate her? My Penemue would do a more than adequate job at it!"

Manny gazed at his cards, not paying Beelzebub any attention.

He wasn't half as threatening as he usually was when surrounded by his flies anyway.

And, well, Manny didn't want to think about the chaos that'd erupted when Lilith had announced that Chloe didn't seem to be experiencing the drying of her ovaries and such that the pureblood demonesses experienced. In other words, his daughter might be the first pureblooded demoness to be able to give birth naturally, and that meant that suddenly demons who'd never broke breath to Manny before were sending him gift baskets, all trying to win favor, especially since his daughter was currently single, working under Lilith herself. Chloe had become a much desired commodity.

Still, despite everything, Manny preferred Sam for her.

"I have no problem with her seeing any of your sons." Azazel surprised them by saying. "But she won't choose them in the end. It will always be my son for her. Because he's her groom and she's his bride." He smirked, finally looking up from his cards. "And if he found out she was dating any demon, his murderous rage would increase and now that I have his soul in my possession, he'd probably kill whoever touched her." The thought made Azazel's face brighten as he turned to Manny. "You should encourage her to date."

Manny shook his head at his friend. "How's his brother taking this?"

"Who cares?" Azazel grumbled.

"That bad?" Manny guessed. "Dean really means a lot to Sam."

"He's just some human. His opinion shouldn't matter." Azazel downed his can of beer in one gulp.

Armaros and Beelzebub exchanged amused looks at his tortured appearance.

"Can you believe the bastard had the nerve to get in my face and blame it all on me?" Azazel sneered. "I would have eviscerated him if I hadn't known that soul or not, Sam wouldn't be happy with his annoying half brother's painful, horrific death."

Manny put down his cards. "Read them and weep, boys."

"How the fuck-?"

"What?"

"How are your cheating methods beating mine?"

Manny just grinned, receiving the contracts to the souls he'd just won, looking them over. "Hmmm. So Armaros, you were the one who owned Lionel Luthor's soul. I was wondering who had gotten to him before me."

Armaros shrugged. "Got him when he was younger. He's old and dried up now. And I got his son's. His doesn't matter anymore."

"Who did the renovations to this place?" Beelzebub changed the subject drastically, looking around the room. "I remember this house before the movie. It wasn't this nice."

"Ah, yes, the movie." Armaros nodded. "I wasn't too sold on the special effects or how the humans were so terrified by mere parlor tricks, but Ryan Reynolds did a great job."

"Yes, he did." Azazel agreed distractedly as he started to deal the cards. "Very realistic."

"I wonder if his soul is up for the grabbing." Manny paused, considering that.

The demons at the table were silent, deep in thought.

Armaros looked down at his body. "It's about time to change my host." He petted his chest. "I wouldn't mind being in a body like that."

Beelzebub frowned, sniffing. "Is that...rotten eggs?"

Manny's eyes widened. "Sulfer."

Armaros winced. "Someone teleported in."

Azazel chuckled evilly, knowing what that meant.

"WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I TOLD EVERYONE ABOUT TELEPORTING INTO MY GODDAMNED HOME?" Chloe could be heard screaming from somewhere in the house.

Someone cried out in pain.

Beelzebub flinched, remembering the first and last time he'd teleported into the Amityville home.

"USE THE FUCKING DOOR LIKE EVERYONE ELSE YOU ASSHOLE!"


Another scream.

Armaros lowered himself slightly in the seat. "She can be so scary sometimes."

"DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO GET THE SMELL OF SULFER OUT OF THE FURNITURE? EVEN THE WALLS REEK OF ROTTEN EGGS FOR WEEKS!"
Something broke loudly. "COME BACK YOU BASTARD!" Something else broke. "DON'T TELEPORT AWAY YOU FUCKING COWARD!"

Azazel grinned. "I love that girl."

Manny smirked, having to agree with that. "Never a dull day with her."

"I wonder who that was." Armaros snickered.

"I take it back, Sam can have her." Beelzebub decided. "She's just too scary sometimes."

Armaros nodded. "Brave man, Sam."

Azazel and Manny shared a look before they began the new game, and continued to gossip about the houses on the area, future progeny, and Ryan Reynold's abs.

And thus passed another regular night of poker with the boys.
Comments 
5th-Jun-2010 04:32 am (UTC)
ROFL. You are just friggin' awesome! This was hillarious. It would be funny if Manny had the body of Ryan Ryenolds. Question, who teleported in?
5th-Jun-2010 04:36 am (UTC)
Thank you thank you! *takes a bow*
*shall have to leave you with that question...for now*
5th-Jun-2010 05:04 am (UTC)
lol awesome . so sam is a full demon now execlllent . i can not wait to read what chloe's rection will be . plus what sam's reaction is to why she really left him . so PPMS
5th-Jun-2010 01:16 pm (UTC)
Yep, they're both up for some big surprises :)
5th-Jun-2010 06:07 am (UTC)
You're kidding. They're like Jewish grandmothers. Bobbe Yenta times four. I could've sworn Beelzebub was going to get all verklempt over how Chloe wasn't letting him start the plague. And . . . well, I half expected the conversation to start being peppered with Yiddish. Or maybe Italian. There's a great deal of similarity between Old World grannies, after all.

I never would have . . . who am I kidding? That's absolutely perfect.
5th-Jun-2010 01:19 pm (UTC)
hahaha! now that you point it out I see the similarities!
5th-Jun-2010 10:57 am (UTC)
Great chapter! Oh, demons, they make me laugh. Also, you know what cures a hangover?



More fic.

I mean this in the most appreciative way possible, and also because I had too much to drink last night. Anyway, keep up the good work and I'll be creeping around on the interwebz.
5th-Jun-2010 01:19 pm (UTC)
haha! That's one hangover cure I've never heard of!
5th-Jun-2010 12:10 pm (UTC)
Who knew that demons could gossip like a bunch of housewives? :):)

I love that Manny's worried about Sam and how Dean's taking the news about Sam embracing his demon side. And Azazel is too cute with this stalwart belief that the Chlam are meant to be :)

Continued excellent work with this series.
5th-Jun-2010 01:20 pm (UTC)
Well, Manny was the one who really bonded with Sam, so he'd be worried about how Dean would react since he knows how much Dean means to Sam. And Azazel. He's just a confident son of a bitch. lol
5th-Jun-2010 02:56 pm (UTC)
Hee!
I was giggling insanely even before I clicked the link.

"And will she let me let them loose as a plague upon the neighborhood while I enjoy poker night with the boys? No. I try tell her: think of the realty value. If a plague occurs prices will drop, people will move...and I can get the neighbor's house at a discounted price! But will she listen to me? Will she have a heart? No." He huffed, looking at his cards. "That's one heartless demon."

Hm... this explains a lot about the sub-prime crisis. Wonder who held the contract on the CEO of Countrywide...

"Crossroads." Azazel replied easily. "I wondered what sort of job would be best for him in his transition period. And those puppy eyes, they're perfect for a Crossroads. Plus. He's built. What mortal woman wouldn't want to kiss and seal the deal?"

Beelzebub snorted. "He isn't all that good looking. Sure, he's ripped, but he's a friggin mountain. That's abnormal."


*nods* This does sound like the perfect job for a demonic Sam. I know I would lose my soul, for sure.

(off-topic, firebunny just posted a BTS picspam on the freakish tallness of Tom Welling, and several people commented, "well, yes, but look at JARED")

Manny just grinned, receiving the contracts to the souls he'd just won, looking them over. "Hmmm. So Armaros, you were the one who owned Lionel Luthor's soul. I was wondering who had gotten to him before me."

Armaros shrugged. "Got him when he was younger. He's old and dried up now. And I got his son's. His doesn't matter anymore."


Everyone knows you're just trying to save face Armaros. Lionel could still out-cheat the lot of you.

"WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I TOLD EVERYONE ABOUT TELEPORTING INTO MY GODDAMNED HOME?"

*ROARS with laughter here* I wonder if Demon!Chloe's up for a guest spot on Jersey Shore?

This was terrific! Now I can't wait for other demon get-togethers. If Sam and Chloe have a baby, they really need to throw a shower. Make sure the happy couple have all their wee!demon necessities.
5th-Jun-2010 03:06 pm (UTC)
I'm so happy to see that you enjoyed this so much! Especially since your comment was what inspired me to write this ;)
Hmmmmm. Demonic baby showers. Save us!
5th-Jun-2010 03:12 pm (UTC)
I'm just so tickled you did it!
(Deleted comment)
5th-Jun-2010 07:54 pm (UTC)
glad you had a good time reading, hon :)
6th-Jun-2010 02:56 am (UTC)
Hilarious! (demon!)Boys night at the Amityville Horror. Priceless. And what a great cameo from Chloe.

Thanks for posting!!!
6th-Jun-2010 03:19 am (UTC)
Thank you for enjoying!
29th-Aug-2010 05:39 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
ROFLMFAO! I died several times reading this, especially how Azazel just snickered when the poor bastard teleported in. Demon!Chloe would scare the crap out of anyone slightly sane, Sam really is brave Can't wait for the next segment *gives Kicked!Puppy eyes* :D
29th-Aug-2010 06:52 pm (UTC)
Oh yes, the next segment in this universe. I'd forgotten all about it! Thanks for reminding me about this :)
19th-Oct-2010 08:48 pm (UTC)
Hahahaha! This was hilarious! Those big bad demon Lords playing poker and gossiping like little old ladies :-) Priceless!

I can't wait for the angst-filled Chloe/Sam reunion though! LoL.

Anyways, very funny fic! I loved the look into what's happening with both Chloe and Sam and how the Demon Lords get down! Hehe. Thanks for writing!
19th-Oct-2010 09:20 pm (UTC)
I thought it'd be so fun to make the demons be shown in a way that was completely different than what one would think ;)
3rd-Nov-2010 10:24 pm (UTC)
Uhh... where's the nearest crossroads? Coz I would like to get me some Sam! :)

I love how you got all these badass demons in one roof, having fun, betting souls, arguing who's better for Chloe like normal people. And I love how Chloe kinna can get them in line.

"WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I TOLD EVERYONE ABOUT TELEPORTING INTO MY GODDAMNED HOME?" Poor demon! I can already picture DemonSam forgetting the "no teleportation" rule and pregnant DemonChloe literally giving him hell! hahaha...

So when will Sam and Chloe meet again and start making demon babies?
3rd-Nov-2010 10:59 pm (UTC)
Oh boy, I"m tempting people to lose their souls!!!! LOL

I figure demons are like humans...but badass and evil.

Haha! It'd be worse if it was demonsam!

Hopefully soon ;)
25th-Sep-2014 07:12 pm (UTC)
Amazing!!! Totally amazing!!!
Oh, God, I started liking demons very much lol
Too much fun
""You just say that because Penemue is small in every aspect." Manny snorted in amusement. "One of my girls told me all about it."" -> This made me laugh so hard that one of my dogs jumped off the sofa scared lol Poor girl
25th-Sep-2014 07:53 pm (UTC)
Yayayayayay!
Again, these demons were hella fun to write!
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