Pairings: Jacob/Edward, some Rosalie/Bella, insinuated other slash werewolf/vampire pairings
Disclaimer: Don't own
Summary: Jacob is in denial. Bella is his sister. Edward is in his mind. And apparently, according to Alice, everyone in the wolf tribe are destined to imprint on a vampire...and will also catch a case of the Gay Flu too. Yep. Jacob's in denial.
A/N1: Severely AU and Slashified...and the characters could very well be considered OOC due to the drastic change in circumstances! Don't like? PLEASE DON'T READ! ALSO! Every single pairing EXCEPT for Carlisle/Esme is uncanon.
IMPORTANT!!!! This is written for my good friend yenny2206, requested as a Christmas Gift by hogwartsvixxen. I hope you two are happy with this :)
"You're an asshole." Jacob mumbled as they stood by his motorcycle at the end of the day.
Edward smirked. "Is that any way to be talking to your boyfriend?"
The vampire hadn't let him forget the incident this morning, and Jacob almost wished that he'd actually agreed to go on that date with Eric instead of somehow stupidly starting this whole mess. He was already screwed up and confused when it came to Edward Cullen, and he had only made things worse by making the vampire his pretend boyfriend. Even if it was only in the eyes of Eric.
Because Eric's eyes...they stared.
They watched intensely.
It was uncomfortable.
Jacob had thought that Eric watched him a lot before, but now it had doubled. It was as if Edward and Jacob were the first gay couple Eric had ever seen and he was fascinated by them.
And that was just sad.
Especially since Jacob and Edward really weren't a couple.
"You know, I actually have to apologize." Edward changed the subject. "Your poem wasn't all that bad.
Of course, it had had nothing on Edward's poem.
Edward's had sounded like something Lord Byron would write.
It had left all the girls (and Mrs. Tatum) in a heap of romantic sighs.
The boys had all looked annoyed and embarrassed at their own poems, and how they withered in comparison.
Jacob had just been frustrated because he was the one stuck reading the poem, and somehow felt he wasn't doing it justice.
"Yours wasn't half bad either." Jacob mumbled, looking down at his helmet, neither boy noticing the school beginning to empty as the buses and cars left.
"Glad you liked it." Edward smiled, running his fingers over the seat of the motorcycle. "You know these sorts of transportation are death traps, right?"
"You remember that I'm a werewolf, right?" Jacob threw back. "All I have to do is shift and I'll heal."
"If you kill yourself you won't be able to shift." Edward nearly snapped, all the playfulness gone from his voice.
Jacob raised an eyebrow, just looking at the vampire.
He didn't know what to say to that because Edward had a point.
Edward always had a point.
Edward was always right.
It was annoying.
"Bella believes she imprinted on Rosalie." Jacob didn't know why he'd said that, why he'd brought up the topic that he'd been desperately trying to avoid.
Edward paused, giving Jacob an odd look that was half calculating and half curious. "She has imprinted on Rose."
"How can you be so sure of this? It could just be a crush." Jacob just couldn't understand it, how they could be bonded to something that was so contrary to their nature.
"If it was something as insignificant as a 'crush' the wolf wouldn't allow it, would it?" Edward asked softly, folding his arms over his chest as he eyed Jacob seriously. "Your wolf sees us as enemies, and our inner creatures views wolves as threats as well. Developing a 'crush' just because is senseless. The only way one could develop feelings for the other is if the inner monsters allowed it, and if the inner monster allows it to happen with your enemy..."
Edward let the sentence end like that.
He didn't need to continue.
As always, he had a point.
Jacob narrowed his eyes, looking up at Edward. "Are you saying you believe I Imprinted on you? Because dad told me all about Imprinting, and nothing that he told me happens-has happened."
"I mean no offense to Charlie," Edward announced. "But considering that he himself as yet to Imprint on someone I do not think he is the best judge."
"He's a wolf. Alice is a vampire. I think he is a better judge than she is when it comes to wolf matters." Jacob growled.
"Look, you're right." Edward sighed, stepping forwards and hesitating a second before reaching out and trailing his finger down the front of Jacob's shirt, expression betraying his fascination by the way Jacob's muscles rippled at his touch. "But you can't deny that there's something between us."
Jacob looked away, gulping, not sure if he was grateful or not for the fact that they were almost completely alone in the parking lot.
"You can read my thoughts, Jake." Edward whispered, finger trailing down to curl in the wolf's jeans waistband. "You can't tell me that you haven't been plagued with questions about that. About why you hear my voice and I hear yours. Why you can't get my smell from your nostrils. Why you're hard right now."
Jacob jerked, eyes widening as he realized that yes, he was hard, and straining against his jeans.
He pulled away, feeling disoriented and confused and aroused.
And the arousal did nothing more than just augment those feeling of disorientation and confusion.
"You want to kiss me right now." Edward smiled.
"No, I-I don't." Jacob shook his head, denial thick and obvious.
Edward's smile turned softly amused. "I can read your thoughts, Jake. Remember that before you try to lie again."
"You nosy creep." Jacob glared at the vampire, running his shaky hand over his hair. "Is this how a relationship with you would be like? No privacy?"
"I'm sorry if you feel that I'm invading your privacy," Edward's smile dropped. "But remember that just as open as you are to me, I am to you."
The wolf perked up a little at that because once more Edward Cullen had a point.
Still, he kept his eyes narrowed. "If that's so, how come I had to find out about you thinking you're my imprintee from my sister?" Jacob frowned. "Why didn't I glean that from your thoughts the moment you started thinking it?" "I really didn't spend time thinking about it after I accepted it." Edward admitted. "When Alice told me about her vision, I hadn't even seen you for the first time, so by the time we met it was already something I accepted so much I didn't even think about it."
Jacob looked up at that, surprised. "You mean she had this vision before you returned to Forks?"
"Why do you think we returned, Jake?" Edward asked softly.
The wolf couldn't believe it.
This completely defeated his argument about Edward maybe picking up on Bella's crush and...
"I'm not gay." Jacob felt the need to point out. "I've been with girls."
"I've never been with anyone." Edward admitted. "I never...never felt the need or desire to. Until now."
Jacob looked up at that, eyes wide. "You...you wanna...with me?"
Edward chuckled and shook his head. "You're so slow."
"Hey!" Jacob cried. "You have to give me some leeway here. I mean. I'm a teenager, and a guy, and a werewolf."
"So you're saying male, teenaged werewolves are naturally slow?" Edward teased.
Jacob blushed, growling in embarrassment.
He hated how Edward always did this to him.
Always left him feeling naive and young and...and...and with the disadvantage.
He hated how Edward was always so calm and in control...of his emotions and of the situation.
Especially when Jacob knew his feelings were out of control now, raging inside of him like a torrent.
Growling, refusing to allow Edward to continue so smug and in control, Jacob grabbed the vampire and jerked him towards him, his lips pressing to Edward's in an open, sloppy, and completely uncoordinated kiss. His awkwardness and confusion and the fact that he really didn't know what he was doing was transmitted into that kiss, and he felt more like a fool than he had before. He probably would have pushed Edward away and shifted just to get the hell out of there, but Edward whimpered breathlessly into the kiss and grabbed hold of Jacob's shirt, clutching it tightly as he arched into him, taking the kiss deeper.Calm down.
Edward's voice was soothing in his mind, calming him as his lips slowed the kiss from its frantic pace. Yes. Like-oh god like that.
That sounded so much like Jacob's dream that he nearly choked, and yet he found his Instinct taking over, his kiss less desperate and more determined, his arm wrapping around Edward's waist, drawing the vampire in tightly.
Jacob swallowed Edward's hiss of need as electricity jolted through their bodies as their hard-ons brushed against each other through their pants.
Finally, before he could do something stupid like push Edward against his stupid little silver Volvo and maybe even embarrass himself by doing something canine like humping him, Jacob ended the kiss, breathing hard.
Edward too, was breathing erratically.
His skin had gone paler than usual, his eyes bleeding black.
Jacob, needing a moment to get himself together, leaned his forehead down against Edward's and closed his eyes.
Okay. Maybe I'm bisexual.
Edward chuckled in amusement, the sound breathy.